And so this is New Year’s

It’s much harder than Christmas. Every year we betrothed again with that New Year’s kiss.

The last one was – i don’t know – 7 years ago maybe or more I have lost track of time, when he was more interested in dancing to Flying Debris. The concept of New Year meant nothing to him.  I grabbed him and kissed him anyway.

Maybe that was a fatal troth, since here we are – here I am – coming up to 4 years since i … incarcerated him in that long term care home.

He forgave me many times, before and after, but i cannot stop grieving