On Friday we went off to Cumberland Day Program to see if Don would accept it better than he did a similar program a couple of years ago, which he still remembers as “that place you were trying to leave me in.”
We went in the back way, avoiding most of the nursing home vistas, and Don seemed to enjoy the morning although he refused to participate in the games due to fear of failure. (I think after awhile he will be ok because the atmosphere is very kind.) He came home saying “Those are people who are trying to do a good thing,” but by early afternoon he did not even remember the experience. That is actually good news, because if he had found it traumatic in any way, he would remember.
For me, the shock was watching him in a situation where he had to function somewhat without me, and realising how very handicapped he is. He had to be helped to put sugar in his coffee by another guest (not too sure how that worked out!).
I realise I have been probably hiding the extent of his disability from myself because we are always in a familiar environment and I am always doing things for him. I feel strange, as if we are moving into a whole new experience and I need a lot of time to process it.
I wonder too if he is going downhill faster than I can keep up. It will be interesting to see what other people think after next weekend when we are having company.
I am not even sure if he is well enough for the day program and will have to discuss that with the co-ordinator next week.
Certainly we will try because he badly needs the stimulation and the experience.